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5 Best Things about Marrying Your Best Friend

Posted by on May 3, 2021 — Drop A Comment

I picked him up at the airport just before
midnight, scruffy and weary after two days of
travel. We had been apart for a month, a decision
we prayed about and made together. Though I
stayed behind, I felt like part of what he was
doing. Questions about our commitment to each
other never entered in. It’s one of the best things
about marrying your best friend.
Follow the hashtag #bestfriend on Instagram and
you’ll find over 61 million images including pets,
marriage proposals, babies, teenagers, and more
pets. A lot of couples describe themselves with
the label “best friend” on social media before
they marry and on special occasions later on.
It isn’t until life partners live in the pressure
cooker of life together that they dig deeper than
companionship and cultivate true friendship.
Best friends aren’t born, they’re developed.
Treasured friendships usually grow over time
and through shared experiences spanning
seasons leading to uncommon understanding
between two people. Some like to think marriage
and friendship are best kept in different beds.
However, marriage between best friends takes
both matrimony and friendship to a whole new
level. Here are 5 of the best things about
marrying your best friend.

    Be married to the one who knows you best.
    Have you ever played the Newlywed Game at a
    marriage event or small group? Everyone wants
    to be the couple who knows all the answers
    about each other. No one wants to be the
    disconnected partner who can’t remember their
    lover’s favorite drive-thru order.
    Ironically, recalling our favorite comedy and the
    song we first danced to doesn’t always indicate
    how good our married life really is. “Knowing”
    goes way beyond the facts of casual friendship.
    The Bible uses the same word for “knowing”
    each other sexually that it uses to describe the
    understanding of a person inside a love
    relationship. “But whoever loves God is known
    by God,” ( 1 Corinthians 8:3 ). To be genuinely
    loved is to be genuinely known. To be genuinely
    known is to be genuinely loved.
    By learning to have full knowledge of each other,
    we understand each other. Nowhere else does a
    relational level of knowing reach the depths of
    who we are at our core than in living life as
    partners, including sharing physical intimacy with
    each other. One of the best things about
    marrying your best friend is the liberty a couple
    The freedom of friendship expresses itself in
    open communication, cooperative partnership,
    and yes, unhindered intimacy. It’s so good to be
    fully known by a best friend who has marriage
    partner level “clearance.”
    Choose to accept the one you love.
    The love of a husband for his wife leads to
    acceptance. As he exercises “agape” love for
    her, he intentionally turns from other priorities,
    accepting her, and joining himself to her. This
    decision to attach comes from a divinely created
    design to develop a best friendship. With the full
    acceptance of an intimately known friend, a
    husband and wife experience certain
    Acceptance doesn’t come with a guarantee of
    constant delight, cooperation, or satisfaction.
    Instead, matrimony purposing to get to the best
    friend level assures both partner that when the
    going gets tough, the friend won’t get going. The
    decision to gut it out through ups and downs
    demonstrates that the relationship is more than
    good company; it’s committed to stretch through
    the seasons.
    Honest married people will admit to having had
    head shaking moments of frustration with their
    spouse. They may even think back to a “different
    option” who had best friend potential but didn’t
    embark on the journey of seasons and years, of
    highs and lows, to get to the kind of knowing you
    only know in marriage. But being married to your
    best friend allows for the benefit of full
    acceptance across the landscape of feelings.
    Being married to your best friend means, “the
    two will become one flesh,” (Ephesians 5:31 ).
    Husband and wife accept one another into one
    another so that they join their separate lives into
    a single life. We know they maintain their
    uniqueness as God created them, but in a
    mysterious way, being known in one flesh
    overflows into being accepted in that oneness.
  3. TRUST
    Believe in the best friend next to you.
    When you’re deeply known and totally accepted
    by the best friend you’re married to, you get to a
    level of safety you didn’t know you could reach
    with another, imperfect human being. You find
    yourself there at the table, in the pew, in bed, and
    online. You trust.
    Experiencing trust with a marriage partner
    doesn’t exclude having a BFF of your same
    gender. Husbands benefit from someone to hang
    out with on a guy’s night. Wives find it helpful to
    have a girlfriend to share with. In fact, closer
    friendship with your spouse usually results in
    further freedom to have a dear friend of your own
    Confident belief in the trustworthy reliability of
    our mate leads to a stronger bond.
    Remember the early days of your relationship?
    Maybe you wondered if you were really both
    serious. Maybe you wondered if someone else
    was moving in on your territory. Maybe you
    questioned if your mate enjoyed flirting with
    others. Maybe you wanted to see who was
    texting. There’s no substitute for time and
    testing to develop trust between friends and,
    even more, between married partners.
    Friendships fall apart without trust, and so do
    marriages. But trust has a way of forging strong
    bonds taking friendships and marriages to “best
    friend” levels.
    Love being with the one you love.
    God gave Adam all of creation to enjoy, but He
    made a husband and wife to enjoy other
    exclusively. Eve was no animal! And despite
    what wives may think at times, a husband is no
    animal either. While neither mate is created to
    provide all the other would need, the Creator
    makes it clear His carefully matched design is
    intended to bring joy.
    After God acknowledged man’s state of being
    alone was “not good,” He responded to the need
    by making a woman. Instead of being perpetually
    separated from anyone who would “get” him,
    God prepared a matching mate to be the kind of
    partner who would be known, accepted, and
    trusted. In a garden of first-born created
    creatures, God brought the first one flesh union
    together with an invitation to, “Enjoy each other
    like no other.”
    The invitation to know, receive, trust and enjoy
    each other was in a class of its own. It’s as if
    God forged marriage and friendship together in a
    relational category all its own. So few go there
    when they settle for companionship or even
    relationship. To build marriage on best friendship
    is to go to a sacred place.
    “Adam, my friend, this is the best friend you’re
    hoping for.”
    “Eve, my daughter, this is the best friend you’ll be
    dreaming of.”
    I don’t have to be my husband’s hiking buddy,
    just like he doesn’t have to be my pottery class
    partner. Having our own interests makes us
    more interesting! But actively pursuing shared
    experiences and mutual interests moves us one
    step closer to being married to our best friend.
    When we live in a veiled version of harmony, less
    than best friends, we miss out on God’s
    invitation to fully enjoy the other half of our one
    flesh union. Without pursuing depth of friendship,
    husbands and wives risk hovering in shallow
    layers of life together without taking the plunge
    into the purest streams intended for their
    oneness. No one wants to stay in murky,
    standing water; it tends to stagnate.
    Hold fast to your friend and mate.
    A deep, clear quality of married life to a best
    friend is a place we want to stay. Are you
    suddenly feeling like your marriage is a thin
    substitute for what could and should be a rich life
    married to your best friend in life? If you want the
    confidence and security that comes with being
    one flesh this way, you’re not alone.
    If you want more for your marriage, you’re
    wanting exactly what God wants. He planned for
    this amazing potential to move in powerful ways
    in our marriages. No one can pray for a husband
    like a wife or husband for a wife. No one can be
    such a completely safe relationship as a wife for
    a husband and a husband for a wife. Marriage
    can be a safe, powerful, inspiring place to be
    when you’re there with your closest friend. When
    a marriage bond also becomes a best friend
    bond, it’s a powerful place to be.
    Rather than fear you’ve married the wrong
    person or lost the chance to go deeper, be
    encouraged that it’s not too late. Best friends
    aren’t born, they’re developed. Your marriage
    and your friendship hasn’t become all it can be
    yet. There’s so much more to develop and
    discover together.
    Genesis 2:24 explains that when a man and
    woman get together, it’s the beginning of learning
    to “hold fast” to each other. Marriage is created
    to be a safe place to find a sacred quality of
    God wants you to get to genuine #bestfriend
    status in your #marriedlife. These are just five of
    the best things about marrying your best friend.
    Put the power of prayer and the Holy Spirit to
    work to get to know, accept, trust, enjoy, and
    keep the best friend you married.

By Julie Sanders

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