Debunking Some Common Myths About OCD

A Few OCD Thoughts That Don’t Fit the Mold

I have Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, or OCD (OCD). Most of the time, the word “suffer” seems too mild.

I have a hard time with intrusive thoughts OCD in particular. My brain, like everyone else’s, has irrational thoughts, but my therapist says that mine are “sticky.” I can’t get rid of the thoughts, which make me think I really do feel as bad as they do. So, my adrenal glands think it’s time to start the fight or flight response, which means they think I should panic because I’m having a mental identity crisis.

In short, I analyze and fight every single thought that comes into my mind. The unwanted thoughts I can’t stop cause such panic in my brain’s neurotransmitters that I can feel the fear and shame in my body.

OCD is much worse than what people think, and I’d like to honor people who have it and their loved ones by breaking down the different types of intrusive thoughts and busting common myths about OCD.

There are four different types of intrusive thoughts in OCD:

  1. Thoughts in your head and taboo practices

Mental Thoughts and Taboo Rituals OCD, which is also called “Religious OCD,” makes people question what’s really in their hearts, especially when it comes to their faith. Fears that people with OCD often have include thinking they’ve slandered God, thinking that because they lied, God will make them dumb, wondering if God will kill a loved one in a car accident because they didn’t go to church, etc.

I have Mental Thoughts and Taboo Rituals OCD, which was made worse by the fact that I grew up in a bad church culture. But don’t lose hope, friend. If you worry about losing God, you have a good heart. It means going after God and putting all your hope in him and his goodness.

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“Have courage and strength. Don’t be afraid of them, because the LORD your God is with you and will never leave you or abandon you. Deuteronomy 31:6

  1. Symmetry

Less than 5% of people with OCD have strange thoughts about symmetry. But this is where the idea that people “like” clean and organized places came from.

People with Symmetry OCD don’t like to match their clothes by color or put their picture frames in order. This doesn’t come from a place of happiness or peace, but from irrational fears that sometimes seem quite reasonable, even real.

People with Symmetry OCD often think that if they don’t straighten the crooked picture frame, it could fall off the wall and kill a family member who was walking under it. So, they can either fix the picture frame right away or become a possible killer. Yes, these are irrational thoughts, and many times, sufferers know they are irrational. However, the thoughts seem so real and real to them that they feel they have no choice but to straighten the picture frame and all the others over and over again, every time, no matter what.

After all, it seems safer to be obsessed with fixing the picture frame than to do nothing and be the reason your baby sister dies, right?

  1. Contamination

I had unwanted thoughts about contamination for years, but they were not too bad. (Although, when I was nine, I got eczema because I used so much hand sanitizer.) But once COVID-19 hit, things became impossible to handle.

I was afraid to leave the house, even to place a grocery order on my phone for mobile pick-up (when I would have no physical contact with anyone). I was scared of shoes because I didn’t know where people’s feet had been, where they had been in the bathroom, how many cigarette ends they had touched, etc. I had no way of letting shoes come near me.

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I’m much better now that I’ve done exposure therapy and taken my medicine. But I still don’t like being near anyone with a band-aid on because I don’t know if their blood is contaminated, and when someone sneezes near me, I usually have an internal meltdown.

In the meantime, Christian counseling has given me a few tools I can use when I’m afraid of germs:

“Did I just go to the bathroom? Am I about to eat or touch my face?” If the answer is no, I don’t run to find germ-X or the nearest sink. I just wait until I’m in my car to use my hand sanitizer or until I get home to wash my hands with soap and warm water.

I say things like, “Peyton, people walk around all the time with bandages on their fingers and elbows. It hasn’t caused enough trouble yet for the CDC to order a stronger way to cover minor wounds. You are okay.”

  1. Harm

Following Mental Thoughts and Taboo Rituals, Harmful thoughts bother me the most. In short, you have irrational fears that you might have hurt someone or that you already have.

You turn your car around and drive back down the road to make sure you didn’t hit a pedestrian or run another car off the road.

You keep thinking back to the time you changed your little cousin’s diaper because you’re afraid you touched them in an inappropriate way while you were cleaning their bottom.

When you bump into a man in the store by accident, you worry that he might think you did it on purpose, which could hurt your relationship with your boyfriend or husband.

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OCD is disgusting. It makes people think they might be murderers, rapists, people who break up marriages, etc. And if you think I’m exaggerating, I have many friends and fellow sufferers, as well as licensed therapists, who can attest to how often people with Harm OCD fight these scary, crippling thoughts.

Most people with OCD deal with one of the four types of intrusive thoughts, and some deal with two. Mental Thoughts and Taboo Rituals, Contamination, and Harm are the three things I fight against. And if I’m being honest, there are times when I ask God why he lets my mind be my living hell, why the one place I hate the most is the one place I can never leave: my own mind.

Still, I have to think about redemption and how wonderful heaven will be when I have a new body and a new mind. I need to remember what it means to make a sacrifice. Maybe my suffering for the Gospel isn’t like ancient martyrdom. Instead, I share my deepest fear that I am my darkest thoughts so that other people with OCD can breathe and say to themselves, “So, I’m not crazy… ” It’s not just me… I am not my thoughts, and God hasn’t left.”

What is healing if there is no sickness? Bad without good? Me if I didn’t go? God, besides making beauty out of ashes?

Don’t lose hope, my dear. God saves the heart, seals the soul, and promises to set us free from our minds one day.

*I am not trained in mental health. But if you think you have Intrusive Thought OCD, I suggest you talk to a trusted mentor, and Christian therapy is a great choice.

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