Pastor Kumuyi’s Sunday Message That Shook Both Singles, Married and The Church Marriage Committee

SUNDAY WORSHIP SERVICE MESSAGE 

DATE: AUGUST 16, 2020

PREACHER: OUR FATHER IN THE LORD, PASTOR W.F. KUMUYI

TOPIC: GOD’S GIFT OF A GOOD, GODLY FAMILY 

Isn’t it wonderful to be in the presence of God for our Sunday worship? We bless His name for making you faithful, that you are there and we pray that the blessing of God be multiplied in your lives as we are together once again in Jesus name.

Once again, I welcome you, I am so happy to have you. It’s always a joy to minister to you. Today we are talking about something very important, fundamental and foundational in the word of God. You will see that as far back as the beginning, the Lord made humans male and female. He had a reason for that. Let’s look at our text.

TEXT:  GENESIS 2:18,21-24

* 18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.

The Lord who created man and had His plan and purpose for it said it is not good for him to be alone. So He planned to make for him a suitable companion.

* 21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;

* 22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.

It was God who planned the first marriage, and He it was who brought the woman to the man, and the man to the woman. He did not take the bone near the foot so that the man will not trample upon his wife. He did not also take it from the head so that the man will not use his mental faculty to overrule the wife. He took the rib near the heart which indicate the love the couple need to have for one another.

* 23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of man

Immediately Adam saw Eve, there was recognition because God gave him discernment, also because God took her out of the him.

* 24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

Adam did not have a father and a mother, but for future generations, what was written in verse 24 was written to be a guide. Note also that at that time, there was no tribe, nations, generations of people, no denominations or religion so that no one will say I did this because of my denomination, tribe or religion. Before the start of any of these things in the world, at the beginning and foundation of uniting a man and a woman, this important command – Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh – was established.

This was exactly what Jesus emphasized in (Matthew 19:4-6) On questions about marriage from us, our children and members of the church, Christ pointed us to the beginning, back to the Bible. Christ supported CREATION, not EVOLUTION. We did not come from apes but from the hands of the Almighty God. He created a man and a woman to be husband and wife and to become one flesh.

A. HIS PREEMINENT PURPOSE FOR A GOOD HELPFUL FAMILY. Genesis 2:18

What is the purpose of God in instituting marriage? If we are going to do anything and do it well, we need a good purpose and if our purpose aligns with that of God, that means we will have the very best. This means we are thinking as God is thinking and our purposes are like His. Making His purpose preeminent in our union and family will make the help and progress He intended in marriage available to us.

What are the purposes for which God instituted marriage?

1. PURPOSEFUL PARTNERSHIP (Genesis 2:18) God said it it is not good for a man to be alone. If you are married already, you must still bear this in mind. God wants a man and a woman to be helpful to each other.

2. PERPETUAL PURITY. God wants the whole church, community and the world to be pure because He knows that immorality will ruin the world, that was why He instituted marriage to prevent fornication and adultery (I Corinthians 7:2,9) It is not proper for anyone to decide to not marry. God does not force marriage on anyone, He is giving you a partner to help you. If you initially flippantly decided to not marry, and you realized that the decision is not of God and you are burning, you have to go back and repent. Repentance must be done not only on sinful acts, but also on foolish utterances and decisions. It is better to marry than to burn.

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3. PREVAILING POWER (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12) If you say you have strength, power, skill, money, wherewithal, and intelligence, Adam was intelligent, rich and had the whole of creation in his possession, yet, he had to marry. Two are better than one. If enemies or situations prevail against one, the other will come to his or her help. The Lord knows you are saved, but the decision to marry is a good one (Matthew 18:18-19).

4. PERTINENT PROTECTION. Marriage protects us, this was God’s plan (I Peter 3:7) Husbands and wives are to dwell together with knowledge. The husband must give honour to the wife as a weaker vessel so that his prayers will not be hindered. Vessels can be of ceramic or clay and both materials are breakable, but if you care for your vessel and keep it in a box or under a cover, it will not easily break. Marriage is for pertinent, present and perpetual protection.

5. PRECIOUS PROCREATION (Genesis 1:27-28) It is the purpose of God for us to replenish the earth. God blessed the couple to be fruitful and procreate so that the process of creation will continue and the world will be populated. Some people in their religion make marriage easy to carry out and they are replenishing the earth with their kinds, whereas, the true church of God at times makes the process of marriage so difficult by so many rules and regulations so that fewer and fewer singles get married. God has given us the green light and encouragement today. Unnecessary hurdles should be taken away from the way of our single brethren who want to get married.

6. PARENTAL PROVISION. When babies are born into the world, they cannot provide for themselves. Parents will meet all their physical needs (Proverbs 22:6) It is good to make good provision for our children’s education but before then, a lot of training from the father and mother ought to have been on. This is why it is good to marry someone who has the same spiritual orientation with you so that you can train up your children in the way of the Lord which is the right way they should go.

7. PARTICIPATORY PILGRIMAGE (Hebrews 11:7-13,23,27) Husbands and wives help themselves in their pilgrimage to heaven. One encourages and strengthens the other when there is weakness. The family of Noah stood by him in all his convictions to prepare for the floods. Abraham’s wife, Sarah shared in his faith, so they could walk with God together. The same faith which Moses’ parents had that made them hide him for three months was the same in Moses. That was why he could forsake Egypt, as seeing Him who is invisible. He was able to discover and pursue the purpose of God for his life because of the godly training his mother gave him.

B. PERSONAL PREPARATION FOR A GODLY, HAPPY FAMILY. Proverbs 24:27

What kind of home and family do you hope to have? You need to prepare for it in the knowledge of the word of God you already have. Prepare properly before you consummate the marriage. 

1. Proper Relationship With The Lord. II Corinthians 6:14-18

God is talking to His children who have a relationship with Him. God is light and in Him is no darkness at all. You should know who you are and where you stand with Him as a temple for His dwelling. If you do not have a relationship with the Lord, you have not fulfilled one of the basic qualifications for marriage. You need to repent and be regenerated and you will become a new creation in Christ.

ch 5:17. How do you know you have a relationship with the Lord? When you become a new creature (John 17:6,14-16) So, when you are praying for the will of God in marriage, He will hear and answer you. The world which hates you will not give you anything good. They will give you a partner that will derail you. Anything from the world to a child of God can never be good. Satan and sinners are evil and they are of the world. 

2. Prayerful Request From The Lord. Proverbs 19:14

A good, prudent and happy wife is from the Lord, just like salvation, sanctification, holiness and a new heart. How did you get all these? By prayer of course. So also will you get a good wife through prayer (Jeremiah29:11-13) God has good thoughts concerning us, this is why we cannot leave Him behind in the quest to get life partners. Since your earthly father cannot deny you of any good thing, so also can your Heavenly Father not deny you of any good thing He has already promised you (Matthew 7:7-11) If we mere mortals know how to give good things to our children, definitely, God will give us even much more.

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Proverbs 18:22. A good wife is a gift from the Lord, so also is a good husband. Just make sure there is no idol in your heart and you love the Lord. Make sure you depend on Him to give you the best.

3. Protective Righteousness Before The Lord.

When we remain righteous before the Lord, we cannot say we are looking for life partners and we do not want to follow the Bible and righteousness. In doing this, we hurt ourselves because righteousness is our protection before God. It will protect us from bad choices, Satan and the evil world in general (Isaiah 54:17) As we plan for and want the best in marriage, we need protection from the Lord and we want the best. 

The righteousness that comes by grace and faith will come to you and be a protection from all attacks and evil. That is why during courtship, righteousness must be the protection. You will not have your wedding to please the world which hates you and from which you need protection (I Corinthians 10:31) As Christians, everything (courtship and all preparation for the traditional and church wedding) should be to the glory of God. The Lord will answer your prayer and lead you to the right partner for your life (I Thessalonians 5:21-22). Choose the counsel you receive from people with carefulness. Abstain from all appearances of evil.

C. PROGRESSIVE PARTNERSHIP IN A GROWING, HEALTHY FAMILY

As we come together in marriage, there must be progress in every aspect of our lives. In our love for one another, in the joy we have in the union, your thirst and passion for heaven, in your commitment and consecration to the work of God, we must move forward.

Take this gift of marriage as from God to make progress in your life.

1. Righteous Fellowship In A Gracious Home. Ephesians 5:1-5

Our homes must be gracious and everybody must see it when they come to us. Now that you are married, you have to learn to do things as people who are married. When leaving the house, you will not go without informing your partner. You will not spend your money as when you were alone. You will be considerate in how you treat each other. Everything you have you show to your wife, do not hide anything from her. We must walk in love (vs 25) Husbands must love their wives just as Christ loved the church, and vice-versa. He gave His totality to the church. 

There are some things we really need to pray about. We are humans and we have our nature. When we were taught the language of English, it was not only the grammar or how to put sentences together, but also the thought patterns of the owners of the language. They brought Literature and everything in it is about relationships, either good, bad or deceptive ones that ruin lives. These may remain in our hearts and they keep coming back to us if we are not careful, so also our experiences in the communities and with our parents. The pictures are in the mind but you must blot them out. 

Husbands, love your wife as Christ loves the church. Some men put their wives in number seven or eight of their priorities. They put almost everything ahead of their wives, whereas, the number one priority after your salvation and readiness for heaven is loving your wife. Some claim to not smoke or drink, but they do not love their wives. Love and take care of your wives as you take care of your own bodies.

This counsel to love is also coming to the wives. They must love their husbands as they take care of their bodies, which is right, especially as they are getting older. They must also preserve their bodies with necessary nutrients and supplements in order to be strong and beautiful as they ought to be. This is the practical righteousness we ought to have.

Philippians 2:3. In the family, from husband to wife, wife to husband, parent to children and vice-versa, if you want to do anything, it must not be for strife or vainglory. We must check up. Nothing small, big, in the night or day must be for vainglory, rather, all should esteem others better than themselves. Plan the best for your wife and husband and there must be reciprocity of every good deed. 

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2. The Refreshing Fulfillment Of Growing Helpfulness. Genesis 2:18

It is not good that the man or the woman should be alone. The original purpose of marriage is to help. Some people say they do not need marriage. Marriage is for procreation, another is to prevent loneliness. Loneliness is a problem: living alone, talking alone, acting and doing everything alone. There are times you need a companion and partner. You need someone by your side to lift the burdens of life with you. Do not look at your age, 40, 50, or how you will not have children because of advanced age. That is not a problem, God promised to give us a suitable helper to give us the kind of help we cannot get from friends, family, relatives and neighbours.

II Samuel 10:11

* And he said, If the Syrians be too strong for me, then thou shalt help me: but if the children of Ammon be too strong for thee, then I will come and help thee. 

You can see the word ‘help’ in the first part of the sentence, and the latter part. The help must be both ways, the husband will help the wife and the wife will reciprocate the kind gesture. Husbands have a way of keeping information about what they are going through from their wives. Understand the reason why God has given you a wife and husband. It is to be of help to one another. 

Let me tell you a secret, there are times when God will withhold an idea from you and give it your wife whom you assumed will not understand. Naturally she would not, but in fulfilling the purpose of the helpmeet, God will give the right idea to her at that particular time. This is because husbands don’t normally look towards their wives for help, whereas, God wants them to. 

3. Rapturable Faithfulness For A Glorious Heaven

The reason why we are in this world together is not only to enjoy it but to do everything together to make it on the day of rapture (I Corinthians 15:19) Our hope must not be limited to this world, otherwise, we will be of all men the most miserable. When it seems as if we are tired and cannot continue, our partner will be a good and encouraging help. This is a major part in our marriage (ch 15:52) It is the will of God for couples to help themselves in their pilgrimage to heaven. By the grace of God, we will be there. Happy and healthy marriages here will produce candidates for heaven. A family that will make heaven will help themselves to get there (Revelation 19:7-9) Every family member must be ready for the rapture. Everything in the family must be for the growth and development of every member.

Brothers, sisters, parents, children, we thank the Lord for all that He has taught us today. A good and godly marriage on earth, and a good passage to glory when the Lord shall come. You will not be found missing. Your marriage will not hinder your righteousness, rapture or relationship with the Lord, rather, it will build and encourage you, and move you forward. 

Forget the past and start afresh today. Everything you ought to be, the Lord will do in your life. Grace upon grace, love upon love and good fellowship in your family and in the church of God. The love of God will grow in your hearts and homes and you will help one another to make it on the last day. Amen for your family.

See What Some Members Have to Say Online Still on the Message

All the reactions above are from the Sunday Message. Lots of people were blessed. And hope both singles and married members learnt alot. And the marriage committee of the church too cos pastor specifically stated that they should stop delaying people’s marriage when they have already lived half of their age.

And these are the prayer point at the end of the message

Pray for the singles, that they will get the chosen partners of God for their lives

Pray for all married brethren, that their marriages will fulfill the purposes of God

Pray for our GS that the Lord will bless and keep him for us. His source of wisdom and knowledge will never run dry in Jesus name

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