The Importance of Keeping Your Marriage to a Believer and Why!
I don’t see how a Christian’s union with an atheist changes anything. Is there even a difference?
Anyone who claims to be a Christian but is contemplating a marriage to someone who does not share their faith should realize that doing so is contrary to God’s will. The reason is laid forth bluntly in 2 Corinthians 6:14. Do not join forces with those who do not believe. What, after all, do virtue and vice have in common? What kind of friendship does light have with the shadows?
Even though it doesn’t seem like a big matter before the wedding, little disagreements after the fact may put a serious strain on a couple’s bond.
Even though it’s funny in retrospect, my husband and I can’t seem to agree on how to eat, serve, and preserve leftover spaghetti. In my family, we always served the sauce on the side. My spouse has fond childhood memories of eating pasta with sauce already poured over it.
Over the years, we have disagreed about whether to store leftover spaghetti and sauce separately or together.
When something as trivial as a disagreement about spaghetti dinners can strain a marriage, it’s easy to imagine how much more serious ideological differences may drive a couple apart.
Dealing with Difficulty and Moving Forward
Some may assume that since we write about marriage, we must know all there is to know about it, but the truth is that most of us are just like you and me and are trying to figure out how to work through the problems in our own relationships while bringing our readers along for the ride.
My husband and I have had some pretty major disagreements over the years, despite the fact that we are married to a pastor and chaplain.
Reality television series like “Wife Swap,” “Married at First Sight,” and “90 Day Fiancée” shed focus on the difficulties that many couples endure in their relationships. These shows highlight how our varied perspectives and lifestyles may have unintended consequences for our partnerships.
We must continually surrender to God in our relationships because of our fallen nature. Through the grace of God and the power of the Holy Spirit, we are continually overcoming our fallen human nature and making progress toward our ultimate goal of union.
How to Deal with Disagreements in Marriage
The protagonists of the reality show “90 Day Fiancée” are Americans who marry foreigners. I can relate to the difficulties these men and women face when marrying someone from a different culture because, although on paper, my husband and I seemed pretty evenly matched as a couple, coming from Christian homes, growing up in the same area of the country, and in a similar family background, we have experienced many of the same difficulties.
When I first started trying to integrate into his family’s routines, I thought I had married someone from another planet. I was also quite attached to my own family and their customs, so I resisted my husband’s and his family’s efforts to change me.
Our common faith in Jesus Christ is the glue that keeps us together as a couple and as a family through the ups and downs of life.
Where It Counts Most When Getting Married
Our marriage has weathered the inevitable storms of life because it is based on a solid foundation. A couple’s faith in Jesus Christ is the only thing that can endure the attacks of the adversary on their marriage.
The devotion of husband and wife to God and obedience to His Word is what motivates them to fulfill their marital vows to God and to each other, even though many people feel effective communication is the key to a long-lasting marriage.
There is a danger to children when parents choose to marry atheists.
Christians who are considering marriage to an unbeliever may not have given much thought to the possibility that their child would grow up without a relationship with God. It’s a major obstacle to producing morally upright children (Malachi 2:15).
Unfortunately, a Christian parent’s worst nightmare frequently comes true: seeing their children adopt their non-Christian partner’s worldview and abandon their own faith in Christ. Many Christians who marry non-Christians appear to fail to realize the impact their partner’s lack of faith will have on their offspring.
Getting married to a non-believer may seem like the only choice for someone who is deeply in love since they can’t see themselves without them for the rest of their lives, but how do they feel about the prospect of spending all of eternity apart?
The non-Christian spouse of a Christian informed her husband, “I would sooner go to hell with our four kids than go to paradise with you,” after 30 years of marriage.
A non-believing spouse’s eventual conversion to Christianity is as improbable as this marriage. Additionally, your future children’s eternal well-being relies significantly on you finding a partner who shares your beliefs, making it crucial that the mother or father of your children also shares your faith.
Going the Christian Route
It’s about prioritizing God’s will above our own when choose somebody to spend the rest of our lives with. What this is about is choosing to put God’s will ahead of our own.
Some Christians, however, believe they are mature and discerning enough to date non-Christians, with the expectation that their partners may one day convert to Christianity. Those who do so disregard the deep psychological, physiological, and even spiritual bonds they are forming with their victims.
Regrettably, they will be led astray if they do not base their dating standards on the teachings of the Bible. In disobedience to God’s Word, we set ourselves up for failure by establishing our own standards.
It is possible to become caught in one’s own sin, as foretold in Proverbs 29:6. One should not undervalue the enemy’s ability to identify and exploit our vulnerabilities, such as a lack of vigilance in protecting against an allure to unbelievers. When that happens, Satan plans to use our own wicked desires to entice us into disobedience.
According to Ephesians 2:2, the spirit at work in people who disobey God is the adversary, and his ways are the ways of the world.
Unfortunately, many Christian men and women have been influenced to marry outside the faith by dating non-Christians, setting their lives in a path that goes against God’s Word.
Nevertheless, Christians are urged by God to avoid dating non-believers and instead prioritize adherence to God’s commands. The following are five suggestions for supporting Christians while they resist.
Ways to Avoid Dating Skeptics
- Pray that God will give you the strength to hold out. Your first step should be to admit your inability and pray for God’s strength. It is said in 1 John 1:9, “If we confess our sins, He is true and just and will forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
- The words “Surely God is my aid; the Lord is the One who sustains me” (Psalm 54:4) from the book of Psalms are another source of comfort.
- Second, let God’s Word reprogram your thoughts and motivations so that they conform to His reality. Spend time in God’s Word, the Bible, and allow it to mold and enhance your worldview.
- Do not have the same mentality that was in the world, but have the mind that was in Christ Jesus (Romans 12:2). Then you may know for sure that God’s will is what you want it to be.
- Check in with how and where you’ve been investing your mental energy and time. “Set your thoughts on things above, not on earthly things,” the apostle Paul writes in Colossians 3:2.
- Make adjustments to your schedule if you realize that you spend too much time in settings that might lead to romantic involvement with people who are not Christians.
- Don’t put yourself in a position to be tempted. Be careful not to put yourself in a position where you’ll be tempted to develop romantic or sexual feelings for an unbeliever if you know you already have a soft spot for them.
- What gives us the strength to resist is described in James 4:7. Worship God as your creator and authority. If you put up enough resistance, Satan will have to retreat.
- Since God has a love for all people and does not want anybody to perish (2 Peter 3:9), you should seek out opportunities to introduce the unbelievers you encounter to Christian organizations and friends of the same sex so that they may be brought to Christ.
- Always tell the truth to skeptics. Explicitly state your reservations about pursuing a romantic relationship with this person. You may explain things to them in a kind, gracious way that shows them God wants them to have a relationship with Him.
- The stance Christians may adopt is outlined in Romans 1:16. As Paul said, “For I am not ashamed of the Gospel, since it is the power of God that gives Salvation to everyone who believes, first to the Jew, and later to the Gentile.”