6 Words of Strength for the Stay at home mother 

6 Words of Support for the Stay at home mother

Due to the expensive expense of daycare, my ludicrous 2-hour commute, and the challenging adjustment from one to two tiny children, I knew I needed to remain at home with the birth of my second child. In spite of this, I am still a stay-at-home mom six years and three kids later.

My decision to become a stay-at-home parent was not an easy one, but I wanted more than anything to be there for my kids. I couldn’t stand the thought of someone else taking care of them for the bulk of the day, and I despised feeling like there wasn’t enough time in the day. However, I did not willingly accept this position.

The hardest part of returning home was dealing with the unending stream of inquiries that wouldn’t go away:

What will other people think of me?”

When asked whether they were, “wasting the finest years of their lives,” they feared, “yes.”

Can I handle being a “full-time” mother?

Caring for young children around the clock is a full-time job in and of itself. I didn’t give myself enough credit for the mental and emotional toll of nonstop child care. But being there when they squeaked, “Mama,” took their first steps, or wanted to discuss about God’s creation over breakfast made it all worthwhile.

If you’re feeling tired today, Mama, I want to encourage you to keep on trying to go to the toilet on your own, receiving as many hugs and kisses as you can, and keeping the faith that one day you will be able to do so.

(1) The Current Period of Time Cannot Last Forever

I get it; everyone from the elderly lady at the supermarket to your doctor feels obligated to provide their two cents. A kind woman tapped me on the shoulder once while I was out shopping with my four-year-old, two-year-old, and three-month-old kids. My eldest was inconsolable, my middle kid was touching every fragile thing in the shop, and my youngest had just vomited up on me. They’ll be adults before you know it, she said with a soft grin. I whirled around and started blinking rapidly: “I’m blinking, but nothing’s happening!”

These days, with my three daughters aged eight, six, and four, I can survive the ordeal that is shopping with them. It’s a whole new world now that my eldest can use the restroom alone, my middle daughter can corral her younger sister, and my youngest can carry things to the vehicle.

If you’re currently dealing with a spate of toddlers, take heart: they’ll soon be able to handle more on their own. Eventually, they learn to control their noise, they discover that there is more to life than chicken nuggets, and they are able to contribute. Burning up the road throughout your teenage years? They’ll receive their license in the not-so-distant future, which should be a welcome respite. In addition, an empty nest might provide welcome respite after the departure of your “little one” to higher education.

(2) Put a halt to your scrolling right now

Whether you’re looking to connect with others, document life’s milestones, or pick up a useful life tip like how to create a whole dinner with just five ingredients, social media is a fantastic resource. However, it also serves as fertile ground for competition and envy. Don’t judge your motherhood success based on how it stacks up to anybody else’s. It’s important to keep in mind that individuals only share the positive aspects of their life online.

Don’t miss out on life with your kids because you’re too busy trying to fit in someone else’s shoes. Relax in the knowledge that God chose you specifically to raise this kid, and know that even when motherhood isn’t Instagram-worthy, you’re still doing a fantastic job (which is most of the time).

(3) Your Home Does Not Need to Appear Immaculate

Because we stay at home with our young children throughout the day, our residences tend to have a “lived in” appearance. The importance of maintaining a clean and hygienic home environment cannot be overstated. For the time being, though, know that smeared peanut butter and jelly or other sticky messes won’t be instantly wiped clean, and neither will every last trace of dust. The fact is that many adults are just as untidy as children. You are neither a better or worse mother or wife based on the condition of your house at 5 o’clock in the evening.

(4) It is okay if you do not shower today.

For over a decade, I woke up at 5 a.m. every day to exercise, put on a suit, and curl my hair. Being a full-time stay-at-home mom to young children was challenging for me because I had a hard time settling into a schedule that made sense for us. You don’t need to get “dressed” if your day consists of driving through mud puddles, creating masterpieces in the style of Picasso, and dealing with a baby that randomly launches their lunch.

Don’t worry; there will come a day when you can skip the sweatpants and spandex and just enjoy the season. Dressing in clothing that enable you to battle dragons with your toddlers or sneak in a stroll around the yard while your kids snooze does not make you a slob or unkempt. Even if you go without a physical shower for a day, I know you were washed with affection.

(5) Your value is not based on how much you get done.

Have you ever felt like you were completely falling apart? I can relate; this is something I battle with even now. Satan is aware of our deep attachment to our offspring. He is aware of our need for order and predictability that planning affords, and he exploits our focus on productivity to arrange our kids’ lives to death. (The prospect of spending the day with nothing to show for it fills me with dread.) He intends to shatter our self-perception as competent and efficient moms by making us feel inadequate when our children do not “timely” fulfill some developmental milestone.

Mom, know that the hours you spend caring for your kids without expecting anything in return will pay off in the long run. Our kids won’t become more intelligent, well-rounded, popular, or happy if their schedules are overbooked. In my first year of being at home with my daughters, I let this line of thought steal my time and convince me that I needed to do more than simply be with them. I overcommitted myself both at home and in the outside world, trying to fill every waking minute with something I might call “productive.” You are not defined by your success or failure as a mother, and you have nothing to prove (or individually). Christ alone gives us value and significance; we are protected by his grace, therefore let go of the pressure to do everything and instead enjoy the present moment with your kids.

(6) Be kind to yourself

Have you ever shouted at your children, only to experience a crushing sense of remorse shortly after? No one is immune to “bad days.” Whenever we’re down, we make poor choices, whether it’s in terms of what we say or how we respond. Being human, this is to be expected.

However, it is particularly important to apologize to our children and anybody else we may have wronged on days like today. When we lose our cool, we may say sorry, accept responsibility for our behavior, and seek forgiveness.

Allow yourself the mercy of forgiving yourself and moving forward. Hours upon hours may be spent contemplating our perceived “failures” as moms. Instead, let’s take advantage of the gift of a merciful God who gives unconditional pardon and a close connection with Himself. Motherhood does not need us to be flawless, but rather to direct our children to the One who is.